Skunky Sick Days

A secretary calls her boss, Dr. LaBeaver,
one morning
and tells him that she is staying home
because she is not feeling well.
"What's the matter?" LaBeaver asks
"I have a case of anal glaucoma,"
she says in a weak voice.

"What the is anal glaucoma?" asks LaBeaver
"I can't see my ass coming into work today." she answers.

Inspector Gadget calls in to Central Office and says,
"Hey, Boss  I am not coming to work today, I am really sick.
I have a  headache, stomach
ache and my legs hurt.

LaBeaver says,
"You know Gadget,
I really need you today. 

When I feel like that I go to my wife
and tell her - give me sex.

That makes everything better and
I go to work You  should try that."

Two hours later Gadget calls again: "Boss, I did what you said
and I feel great, I'll  be at central soon.
You have a nice house."